Courtesy and the Plight of Those Struggling to See Humility
I don't think I realized just how much of a toll being courteous would take on me... and it's only day 3! Does that sound pathetic? Just a little bit; but if I really sit and ponder the effect that turning attention to others and away from myself has, I think this is a good thing.
At the end of the day, those who follow after Jesus really should be seeking to make less of themselves, more of others, and most of God; an admirable goal to set before yourself, however, I'm not sure if people really understand the weight to that calling. I'm starting to have a taste of just how difficult this vocations is, while not even a fraction into this season before Easter.
Lent is supposed to be a challenge; where every day you wake up and experience more moments where you have to stop, think of the repercussions of your actions, and (usually) choose a different course. I've witnessed this at work on the very first day of my 'discourteous' fast.
Working in a job such as nursing, you are confronted with a lot of very challenging situations that no schooling, life experience, or quietly pumping yourself up can ever prepare you for. You are all of a sudden whipped into a unit with 70+ strong employees, well over 75% of them being women. Now women gossip. And bicker. And skulk. And give cold shoulders as if there isn't a sweater to be had. Do you have any idea just how difficult it is to be neutral, unattached, and a proverbial Switzerland in their emotional world wars? If one of your coworkers turns to you to talk about another nurse, it's common courtesy to halt them there. When will they realize that I don't want to hear about their beef with someone that I actually like quite a bit, or that while so-and-so didn't do that particular dressing in an adequate amount of time doesn't mean that they can't do it themselves?
I think I am becoming more aware with just how selfish this world is. It's one thing to live on this planet and not spend time thinking about it, but when you intentionally set yourself apart to serve others, to lift them up, to better them, and to love on them as we are called to, you become hypersensitive and hyperaware of just how people dislike to put others before themselves.
A good example of this comes from a patient I've had in the past. He was a little old Asian man with dementia and would often ramble off in ways that dementia patient's can do really well. He made a comment to me that was really quite striking; he said, "People are always giving money away but you have to make sure you have enough for yourself first." Now there are all manner of cheap-Asian jokes that one could make here but that's not my point. Even someone who no longer has a firm grip on reality is so focused on self-preservation, self-wealth, self-comfort, and self-efficacy. We've programmed into ourselves that we have to fix ourselves up first, then if we have any scraps, they can go to the underprivileged of this world... but that's not just talking about finances. We hold others up to such high expectations and tend to miss the boat ourselves.
Who came up with this!? And better yet, why do we think this is okay?!
It's not normal to put others first, I know that. It's hard to do once let alone maintain for any extended period of time. But why is it that way? Why is it normal to be self-absorbed, self-focused, self-centred? Yes, it's easier, but it doesn't give a 10th of the satisfaction that doing someone else's dishes, letting someone in when you're stuck in traffic, or holding open the door for the little old lady with a walker to go through.
Chivalry is not dead. Chivalry has be squashed by the feminists, the selfish, the gluttons, and self-righteous of this world who proclaim that they'd rather do things for themselves than rely on someone else, or wait for someone else to do it wrong. But it's not dead. There are still men and women who genuinely desire to put others before themselves. To lift others ahead of themselves in true humility.
Is it courteous to post something like this that calls out people in their selfishness? Yes, I think it is. Because at the end of the day, we're all on Earth with each other for a very short amount of time. Why not halt that gossiping tongue? Why not bite the bullet and clean up after someone who doesn't realize that it's wearing thin on you? Why not put someone above yourself for even a short while to see how good it feels to not always be the centre of the universe?
At the end of the day, those who follow after Jesus really should be seeking to make less of themselves, more of others, and most of God; an admirable goal to set before yourself, however, I'm not sure if people really understand the weight to that calling. I'm starting to have a taste of just how difficult this vocations is, while not even a fraction into this season before Easter.
Lent is supposed to be a challenge; where every day you wake up and experience more moments where you have to stop, think of the repercussions of your actions, and (usually) choose a different course. I've witnessed this at work on the very first day of my 'discourteous' fast.
Working in a job such as nursing, you are confronted with a lot of very challenging situations that no schooling, life experience, or quietly pumping yourself up can ever prepare you for. You are all of a sudden whipped into a unit with 70+ strong employees, well over 75% of them being women. Now women gossip. And bicker. And skulk. And give cold shoulders as if there isn't a sweater to be had. Do you have any idea just how difficult it is to be neutral, unattached, and a proverbial Switzerland in their emotional world wars? If one of your coworkers turns to you to talk about another nurse, it's common courtesy to halt them there. When will they realize that I don't want to hear about their beef with someone that I actually like quite a bit, or that while so-and-so didn't do that particular dressing in an adequate amount of time doesn't mean that they can't do it themselves?
I think I am becoming more aware with just how selfish this world is. It's one thing to live on this planet and not spend time thinking about it, but when you intentionally set yourself apart to serve others, to lift them up, to better them, and to love on them as we are called to, you become hypersensitive and hyperaware of just how people dislike to put others before themselves.
A good example of this comes from a patient I've had in the past. He was a little old Asian man with dementia and would often ramble off in ways that dementia patient's can do really well. He made a comment to me that was really quite striking; he said, "People are always giving money away but you have to make sure you have enough for yourself first." Now there are all manner of cheap-Asian jokes that one could make here but that's not my point. Even someone who no longer has a firm grip on reality is so focused on self-preservation, self-wealth, self-comfort, and self-efficacy. We've programmed into ourselves that we have to fix ourselves up first, then if we have any scraps, they can go to the underprivileged of this world... but that's not just talking about finances. We hold others up to such high expectations and tend to miss the boat ourselves.
Who came up with this!? And better yet, why do we think this is okay?!
It's not normal to put others first, I know that. It's hard to do once let alone maintain for any extended period of time. But why is it that way? Why is it normal to be self-absorbed, self-focused, self-centred? Yes, it's easier, but it doesn't give a 10th of the satisfaction that doing someone else's dishes, letting someone in when you're stuck in traffic, or holding open the door for the little old lady with a walker to go through.
Chivalry is not dead. Chivalry has be squashed by the feminists, the selfish, the gluttons, and self-righteous of this world who proclaim that they'd rather do things for themselves than rely on someone else, or wait for someone else to do it wrong. But it's not dead. There are still men and women who genuinely desire to put others before themselves. To lift others ahead of themselves in true humility.
Is it courteous to post something like this that calls out people in their selfishness? Yes, I think it is. Because at the end of the day, we're all on Earth with each other for a very short amount of time. Why not halt that gossiping tongue? Why not bite the bullet and clean up after someone who doesn't realize that it's wearing thin on you? Why not put someone above yourself for even a short while to see how good it feels to not always be the centre of the universe?
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